My students have midterms this week, and I never thought I would say this, but I love exams! My classes have been getting canceled/shortened with increasing frequency for the last 2 weeks. It's nice to have some down time, especially since my teaching schedule this semester is a little hectic. It's also giving me time to think about what I want to do next.
I was accepted to law school, decided on Temple, and have even put down my seat deposit for next year. And panic has set it. Am I ready to commit to being a student again? Am I prepared to settle down? To me, law school pretty much means the end of my freedom. No more traveling. It signifies the time to settle down, get a real, big-girl job, maybe get married and have kids. I'm only 23. I feel like I'm still too young to stop really living and settle down. Maybe this is a bad sign? That I view settling down as boring, and more or less the end of my life. Or at least, my life as I know it.
At the same time, I'm really pretty excited to go home. I'm really enjoying Korea right now, but I'm still counting down the days until I can go home and be back in a culture that I generally understand. Don't get me wrong, I've definitely experience Korean culture and kind of understand it, but a lot of things just throw me off. I have plenty of moments where I just think, "Really? Did I just see that? Did you just say that? Did that just happen?" So normalcy, at least my version of it, is appealing right now. Not to mention getting to a gym that has equipment I can use (the elipticals here a different and the stride it short, not meant for long legs which is unfortunate for me).
So I'm considering my options. Going home for a bit and then doing something else. Or just going directly to law school. Both are good options, but I'm terrified of making the wrong decision for living with the 'What ifs' What if I had done ______? Would I have more opportunities? Doing something else could be a huge benefit to me in the long run, and an experience of a life time, but do I REALLY want to spend more time in a foreign place, being stared and pointed at? Yeah, I love to travel, see the world, and experience new cultures. I think it's really important that we try to understand each other. But at the same time, I've already traveled quite a bit. Of course, there's more I want to see. I want to see everything and I want to do what I can while I'm still young and able.
Anyway, I'm confusing myself. I change my mind about every-other day. Not unusual for me. I really want a magic 8-ball for life that will tell me what it is I should do. But making decisions is a big, sometimes terrifying, part of life. I really feel like I have good options and whatever I do will be fine. It's just a matter of figuring out whats best.
Alright, enough rambling. About my indecision, anyway. Here are some of my thoughts about other foreigners in Korea. Some use their time here to grow, to think about life, and figure out what they want to do. Being here is a a kind of break from real life. Or a temporary escape. This is what it is and has been for me. It given me time to really consider my options and what I want to do next. But it's definitely not a life-long job for me.
Others, however, come to Korea, maybe in their early-to-mid-twenties and stall. They decide to stay, maybe just for 3 years, sometimes for 20 years. And some, not all, stay at the maturity level they were at when they arrived. There are grown men here, in the 40s, who act like overly obnoxious 25 year-old's. It not just 40 year-old men, either. Women also stall. It's really kind of sad and frustrating for those of us who have to deal with these people. Grow up! It's not like they need to stop partying, it's more about having a mature attitude toward life and those around you. Stop acting like my middle school students! It's probably time for them to go home, but they have grown comfortable in Korea, enjoying the (relatively) easy life they have here and don't want to return to somewhere they would be forced to act like and adult. I might be being a little harsh, but it's true.
But, moving on. Korea is good. I went on a mini-hike, really more of a walk in the woods, with Jess to Bukhansan this weekend. Saw a pretty cool, very large, Buddha and lanterns were everywhere, which was neat. Ate a massive amount of Mexican food for Easter dinner with some friends ^-^ Because, really, what's better on Easter than Mexican? Especially when you don't have an oven to really cook with?
I've started souvenir shopping and packing up my winter stuff to ship home. I'm watching the Phillies games online (right now I'm not too happy since their loosing to the Diamond Backs. Come on! Really?!?) but I can't wait to get back and go to an actual game or even just be able to watch it on TV.
Aaaannnddd that it. Nothing else. Sorry, this wasn't that interesting of a post, but I'm bored at work :)
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